Make Him Feel Compelled To Be With You – Without Saying A Word

Leigha Lake

If your man seems to be losing interest and everything you’re doing and saying right now to try and get as close as possible – doesn’t seem to be working
– I can help!

If you’re feeling afraid you’re going to lose him if you don’t do something quick – you’re not alone.

I remember sitting on the couch right next to the man I was in love with, feeling unloved and insecure because he felt miles away from me. I kept wondering, “How do I get him to pay attention to me and give me the love and affection he did in the beginning?”

What I did next felt like the logical next step…

What You Don’t Want To Do

I asked him what was going on with him…and he replied back with, “I’m not sure, I just feel confused right now, I’ll call you tomorrow.”

It’s what we instinctively want to do at this point that actually works against us:

Asking him to talk about his feelings

Asking him how he feels about you

Asking him how he feels about the relationship

Calling him to check in with him

Sending him cute little texts

Letting him know exactly how you feel about HIM

As soon as we feel the space between us getting wider – we instantly begin feeling anxious, insecure and scared – then we instinctively want to close the gap.

Sometimes we start trying to convince him of how great we are,
how he’ll never find someone to love him like we do, or how amazing we are as a couple.

This instantly makes a man feel turned off.

It makes us look needy and desperate – any kind of convincing behavior will make a man want to run far far away – as fast as he can!

You may even start to feel angry and want to let him know you’re not ok with how he’s acting… this makes a man see you as emotionally unstable.

He’ll feel at a “gut” level you’re not the woman for him.

How To Immediately Turn Everything Around And Get Your Power Back

The instant you begin to feel him moving away – ALL you need to do is NOT move towards him in any way (don’t even think about him when he’s not in front of you) and hold the space for him. If that’s all you did – your relationship could turn around practically overnight!

This has a “rubber-band effect” and he WILL come back. He needs the tension to come back though – this is where we typically put “slack” in the rubber-band by leaning forward and he begins to slowly lose attraction.

When he “gets” you’re not going to chase him and you’re ok whether he’s in your life or not – it will instantly make him see you differently than any other woman.

It will make any masculine man feel drawn to you and you don’t even need to “talk” about it. It’s all in your vibe!

Here’s the thing – once we start feeling bad and uncertain about our relationship – it’s soooo hard to get back to our happy place, right?

If only we could – but how do we do that when we feel
the way we do about our man?

If you don’t learn how to hold the space for a man when he starts pulling away (men generally need more space than women) – you’ll keep experiencing the pain and frustration of your relationship not being everything you know it could be.

When you learn exactly what to do to get your relationship back on track and KEEP it on track – you’ll experience your masculine man giving you all the time, love attention, affection, romance, fun and get the commitment you desire – WITHOUT saying a word!

The Hardest Part About Not Leaning Forward

When we’re feeling anxious, unsure and scared about where our relationship is going because it looks like it just took a turn in the wrong direction…it’s what we do next that can transform EVERYTHING.

It’s TRUSTING he’ll come back if we don’t DO anything.

It feels completely counter-intuitive and yet it’s the quickest way to get your relationship back on track!


  1. Latonya Whitmore

    I just want to say that I have been learning and practicing how to lean back in a no title relationship with a man I’ve been dating for one year. Towards the end of the year after Sweetest Day he started slowly pulling away.. I didn’t pay attention and started doing more things I thought he’d like even down to buying a pair of designer glasses for him for Xmas. This is when the damage started. He really pulled away after an argument he started before New Years. He spent New Years with the guys and Acted really different. The following days I leaned so far back out of anger that I was ignoring his calls and his texts for days until I was ready to talk. We never really talked but when we did he asked what was my problem and I told him it seems like you needed some space and he said yes I do. So for the next week I literally leaned alllllll the way back. Two days past with nothing from either of us. Then something happened. He started texting me good morning I mirrored his actions. Every day he texted me but no calls. I mirrored him. It’s been a week and he finally asked if I missed him and I said yes and he said I missed me too. I’m going to continue to lean back and mirror his actions and once I see him I will tell him how I feel. Using feeling messages. I don’t know what else I should be doing. We go on dates when I ask but I want him to initiate some of them. How do I get him to do this?

  2. Mary

    I have a long distance relationship or dating this man since November 9, 2018. He seems to be pulling away. We don’t talk like we used to or if I say something he said you already said that. He doesn’t text me through the day as he did. Now he calls very brief. I am at point that I cant deal without communicating and honesty. But i am trying to give him space too. I live in AZ and he is in Colorado.

    • llake

      Hi Mary, Unfortunately if your relationship is long distance and he’s pulling away the best thing you can do is move on. He’s basically telling you he’s done without actually saying it. If he wanted a real relationship you would know it and you wouldn’t be feeling so horrible. Talking about it won’t change anything. Only be available for men who show you in words and actions (consistently over a 6 month period) that they are falling madly in love with you. If that’s not apparent, you’re allowing yourself to be open to heartbreak and unavailable men.


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Hey, Leigha here – I’m a mom, wife, lover of the outdoors & Relationship Coach for High-Achieving Women. My mission is to help women steer clear of unhealthy, toxic, soul-destroying relationships and show them how to attract an integrated masculine man, and live a deeply rich and fulfilling life.

Early stages of dating

Bonding stages of dating

Long term relationships


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