The Biggest (Most Common) Mistake Women Make While Dating

Leigha Lake

The most common mistake I see highly self-aware women (who’ve been doing inner work for years) make that stops them from attracting and being with the right man is giving too much benefit of the doubt to “the man with potential” in hopes that one day soon he’ll be the man they know he can be.

This is a dead-end road. 

Women do this because of the distorted thinking that overrides their feelings and intuition. 

They also don’t know how to quickly recognize healthy and unhealthy behaviors in men so it’s easy to let them slide and get sucked in (aka giving the benefit of the doubt!). (I teach exactly how to avoid the wrong men and how to attract the right one in my Legendary Love program!)

It would be great if dating was super straightforward but it’s not! There’s too much dating advice telling you to change yourself, help and inspire men to ask you out, and for you to be more feminine so it can happen. This is the feminine energy trap that comes along with the potential man trap. lol (Learning about masculine and feminine energy is good until you use it against yourself!! And that’s what women are doing!)

Some examples of distorted thinking that override your intuition are: I don’t want to be too picky, have too high of expectations, be too high-maintenance, too judgemental or harsh, etc. No one is perfect. Maybe I’m the exception and he’ll see I’m not like all other women. Maybe I need to be more in my feminine energy to inspire him. This may be as good as it gets. It’s not that bad. I don’t want to be alone anymore. (These may or may not be the ones you use and the thing is you most likely don’t even know you’re saying these things.)

Once you end up settling into the Potential Man Trap, it does not get better. In fact, it gets much worse, because rather than facing the truth of the situation and getting out, women turn in on themselves and do everything they can to inspire a man to be the man they hope he can be. Sometimes they have to lie to themselves about what they really want in order to stay because they know they’re meant for more. They spend years with men who can’t love them the way they should be loved.

Let me help you save yourself from EVER ending up in this situation! 

There are always signs and feelings you get at the beginning of a relationship (and when you first meet a man) that tell you it’s right or it’s not right for you. 

Yet, it’s so easy to override those feelings and nudges and wait for “confirmation” that they’re true (and this is normal human behavior to a degree). 

The goal isn’t to always trust and act on our intuition the first time it tells us something is off. (That’s very unrealistic.) The goal is to shorten the timeframe from when our intuition is talking to us, learning to tune in and get curious and observe, and then take appropriate action. (This is EXACTLY what I do with my clients.)

A woman becomes more in tune with herself the more aware she is of what’s healthy and what’s not. The more awareness a woman has around healthy and unhealthy behavior patterns, the less she’ll be able to tolerate unhealthy behavior emotionally, physically, and spiritually.

The awareness around the Potential Man Trap and being able to identify healthy and unhealthy behaviors in men, catching the distorted thoughts that cause you to self-sabotage, and learning to feel into and trust your intuition will put you on the fast track to attracting the right man for you! This is exactly what I teach in Legendary Love.

I’ve turned Legendary Love into an 8-week hybrid program that includes private messaging with me and group coaching once a week plus the course material. 

If you’re done wasting years of your life with the wrong men and ready to get on the fast track for attracting the right man, reply to this email and tell me a little bit about your love life, and I’ll ask you a few questions, and if it’s a good fit, you can get started right away. 

I have special pricing for women who join in July! (It’s my birthday month and official 10-year coaching anniversary!)

Love, Leigha

P.S. Here’s what one woman had to say about Legendary Love


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Hey, Leigha here – I’m a mom, wife, lover of the outdoors & Relationship Coach for High-Achieving Women. My mission is to help women steer clear of unhealthy, toxic, soul-destroying relationships and show them how to attract an integrated masculine man, and live a deeply rich and fulfilling life.

Early stages of dating

Bonding stages of dating

Long term relationships


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