How To Get Your Man To Open Up

Leigha Lake

Here’s a great question from Miranda – who’s experiencing the very beginning of a very promising relationship. Everything about this man appears perfect – like “too good to be true” perfect – and yet he’s consistently doing everything a man automatically and instinctively does when he’s really interested in a woman. Yayyyy!!!!


“Hi Leigha, I was wondering if you could write about how to talk to talk a man about the important things like his past and his finances. (I wish I could run a credit check and a background check haha.) Thanks!”


I’m sure we can all relate to wanting to know the “particulars” of a man’s situation. Who wants to get too invested before learning there’s no way it can work out? It also feels scary when a relationship feels too easy and a man seems too good to be true and we’re just waiting for the “bad” news.

Instead of trying to figure out “how to” go about digging deeper – I want to teach you how to inspire him to feel safe enough to just open up.

In my experience, most men will be upfront about their situation and they’ll tell you within the first 3 months – without you having to say a word!  (I’ve been on first dates where the men have told me they had spent time in prison as a felon.)

If you’ve been reading my newsletters and blog posts, you know that everything from the 1st date up until 3 – 4 months is all imaginary – and your only job is to experience being with this man, not get overly invested and to have FUN! (This is how we protect ourselves from being blindsided – not by becoming investigators.)

If your relationship is long distance – the timeline will be based more on how many times you’ve actually seen each other in person.

Your only job is to enjoy being in his presence, letting him give to you and receiving what he has to offer.

The more we can receive what a man has to offer…the more he wants to give to us and that includes opening up about how he feels, how he thinks and the things he thinks you need to know about him – without us doing any prompting or “investigating”.  He won’t feel you’re trying to “get” something from him and instinctively be “on guard” or needing to prove himself, without knowing why he feels that way.

Next time you’re with your man and you’re feeling the urge to “dig deeper” – Do This

Become aware of what your man is doing.  Become aware of how you’re feeling in your body.  Imagine slowing down time – then imagine your body glowing and shining luminescent light.

When we’re “digging deeper” we’re completely leaning forward energetically, which pushes our man away.

When we get back into our bodies – we shift our vibe instantly and he’ll feel it!!

He’ll want to get closer and more than likely open up even more than he would’ve through any kind of questions you might have asked.

I would love to hear how this works for you and how your man responds!

Love, Leigha


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Hey, Leigha here – I’m a mom, wife, lover of the outdoors & Relationship Coach for High-Achieving Women. My mission is to help women steer clear of unhealthy, toxic, soul-destroying relationships and show them how to attract an integrated masculine man, and live a deeply rich and fulfilling life.

Early stages of dating

Bonding stages of dating

Long term relationships


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